Catholic Guilt

I don't know where to start. I would like to start by saying I hate guilt. Its just sitting in the pit of my stomach aching. But I cant really justify it. I made a mistake, my ex and I have a group of mutual friends. It has been three months since he and I split. I am seeing one of our mutual friends now. He found out. He is irate. I feel horrible. Should I? Do I not deserve to be happy? He broke up with ME damn it. Here's the thing, we were friends (the ex and I) we had finally got to a point where we could hang out together and gatherings of these aforementioned friends. Well Saturday night there was a party, we were both there and I was plastered. It was a few hours into the party and he and I were getting along great. Somehow someway, which I cant remember why, I TOLD HIM. WTF? Why would I do that! I really don't remember what he said, I know he was pissed and told me friends were supposed to be off limits. Then he proceeded to take this guy I'm sorta seeing aside and have a 'talk' with him. I was instantly mortified. It was one of those anchorman moments when he jumps in the bear pit to save his woman "I immediately regret this decision". I cant for the life of me figure out why I decided it would be a good idea to tell him! I understand how he could be upset, truly. I have no reason to hurt him I would never want to hurt him, even though he broke my heart. I want to think that we are both adults and that I should be able to date whomever I chose. I feel badly though for making it an uncomfortable situation for everyone involved. I do feel better after writing. I just wish I could take it back, I'm not sure which part though seeing this guy all together or telling the ex. I like the guy though, I would like to see where it goes. I'm I a horrible person? Ugh

Skeezy Ex-Boyfriends

Why is it that when you and your boyfriend spit no matter the circumstances they always booty call you?

Seriously... My ex and I split a month ago. He told me he needed space, and we wanted different things, and he was not ready to be in a committed.....yank yank your 37 grow up. Anyways I digress.... Do not tell me you need space then call me a month later and say the following "So this is gonna sound really tacky but you like maybe wanna fuck?" Ummm NO! Nothing good can come from a conversation that starts with "This is gonna sound really tacky" All I could think was wow. I'm finally in a place where I feel like we can be friends, and you ask that!! Oh man it was funny. It all worked out though I told him no way in hell, and then we had a good little talk so all is well I just had to share the fact that it just never ceases to amaze me that men always still want the sex after the break up, sorry boys it just doesn't work that way, Oh unless of course the sex is amazing then something might be able to be worked out :P! Thanks Interwebs for letting me vent! Happy Thursday!

We Got It!!

Horray!! We got the dream house! What a huge relief I am soooo damn excited I dont even know what to do with myslef! Now we move on to the next stage of stress.... coming up with the money! Then it will be moving.... I cant wait for September!!! whooooooooraaaahhhhh

Really Craigslist? Really?

Im sooo over this tedious process of every morning, getting up, sitting at the computer, copying and pasting, editing and fine tuning, spell checking then sending, recording and crossing my fingers. All for not. For all the resumes I send out I must statistically get responses from 1% of them. After talking with my friend more like venting with my friend, we came to a great conclusion where I will get the best of both worlds. I am going to apply to every job posting I can on CL in the Seattle/Tacoma area, and blog about the responses I will 'hopefully' get back. Although I have to admit part of me still believes when I send my resumes, they just float around in purgatory never reaching their final destination. I figure that the more I send out, the more responses I will get, so yes this will be a lot of work but that's good on several points. 1: I stay busy! 2:Maybe just maybe I will get an interview out of the ordeal, and 3: We will all be entertained by my venting, and talking about weird responses I get. I think its a win win for all! Stay tuned!

Door to Door Dog Breeders and Rain

I just had to share the weirdest 'door to door' situation I have ever experienced. So I'm hanging out on the couch watching some mindless garbage on the tube when the doorbell rings, mind you I didn't even realize I had a doorbell so I was wondering what the hell it could be. So I answer the door and it was a lady probably in her 60's and she said the following "Hello there this is going to sound a little weird but I am walking around asking if anyone owns a male black Pomeranian, please tell me you do?" I kinda scrunched my brows and come to think of it I was probably looking at her like she was crazy, at least that is what I was thinking. I told her I don't have one and she proceeded to ask me if anyone I knew had one, I looked like I was thinking a little just to throw the crazy lady a bone, but no, no one I know has a black pom. Then she asked me if I has ever seen one around the neighborhood. I said no, and asked her why she was so persistent to find one, and she told me she has a female in the car that is ready to be pregnant and she is looking to find her a mate and she was willing to pay. I tried to hold laughter and said good luck and sent her on her way. She was either drunk or just very loud and eccentric, either way, random. As I watched her out the window, cause yes I was amused, she proceed to walk all over the neighborhood door to door. At one point she came back to her car for a piece of paper and a pen... he he he hears to hoping her puppy found love!

Oh and by the way I am soooo damn happy the rain is back here in Seattle I love it!!!

Cheers

Change In the Air

I swear there is something up this summer. It seems like everyone I know has something new and different going on right now, including myself. I currently am newly single, house hunting, and job searching. Yep the only thing solid in my life right now are family and friends. Thank God for family and friends. I have been job searching since January and it is getting OLD! Now on top of that stress I moved out of my ex's apartment last week and am staying in a big empty house that is currently for sale while I try to find a new home. I swear I feel like I'm 21 all over again. Is this normal for a 28 year old? should I feel like a failure? I say No. I was trapped in a very unhappy relationship for way to long and I feel great now. A new lease on life is headed my way... or so I hope. Well I'm excited to see what this air of change will bring me and everyone else I know experiencing it. Good luck to all, jump in with your eyes and your heart open!

Rural Doctors

WTF! First of all I grew up in a small country town in eastern Washington, so I know the "sub-par" doctor routine. Lets just say I grew up on the border of Canada and the closest 'US' hospital was about 30 miles away, in a town where the population in 2008 was 941! No I didn't stutter... 941. Needless to say I was born in Canada.

OK I digress. I got a call this morning from an urgent care in Leavenworth, WA (also a very small town). This doctor informed me that I owe them $963.00 for ... drum roll please ... 20 min.

The story goes as follows: It was Memorial weekend and my boyfriend at the time and I decided to take a 6 day camping/fishing trip to Lake Wenantchee, near Leavenworth. We arrived on a Wednesday and I swear the camping Gods where laughing watching us come. Eventually it ended up being a great trip BUT, the first day was the worst, weaker people would have given up and left.

All was well, we got the tackle box (full of about $150 dollars worth of doodads) and our poles ready and headed to Fish lake for a nice day of fishing, we arrived and rented a little motor boat. Loaded up the boat sat down and headed out, it was a beautiful day and I couldn't be happier to be on the water. We got about 50 yards out and I yelped. I had sat down unevenly on this rickety old boat and set my hands down to adjust my self to middle of the seat, when BAM I set my ring finger in a huge fat barbed hook. Yes big wow it doesn't sound like that big of a deal, but this hook was gnarly, and it went in as deep as it could have without popping out the other side. My boyfriend was not amused by my whimpering. I begged him to please turn around so I could get help. After some major convincing, he realized the severity of the situation and we hauled back to the dock. No one at the lake wanted anything to do with removing the hook. We pulled and yanked and the dam thing would not budge. This only meant one thing, a trip to Leavenworth about 40 min away. We arrived at the 'urgent care' what seemed like hours later and could feel my heartbeat in the tip of my finger. Needless to say I wanted the hook out of my finger, I wanted to be fishing and drinking and kicking back, not at an emergency room in BFE. They took me into some little room and made several attempts to pull it out to no avail. Then they decided to pop it through the other side and attempt to cut the barb off so they could pull it through, I really felt like this was the first time they had ever seen this. The doctor tried FOUR different cutting tools and could not get through the hook. So plan C was to stick my finger four times to numb it and cut my finger open to remove the hook. Long story short...ha ha... I left after about 20min. with three stitches and no pain meds with 5 days left in the woods.

We headed back to camp to realize we left out all of our bread products and they had all been destroyed by the wildlife... big grrrr. We laughed it off and said screw it were going fishing. Somehow in the commotion of getting off the lake earlier in the day and to the hospital we had left out tackle box on the boat. When we went back to look for it it was gone, never to be seen again. I remind you this is day one, I have not had a drink yet, been to the hospital, lost all our bread and buns, and now cannot fish for the rest of the week. We did not give up. We headed to the store to get bread and tackle and had a great rest of the week.

Cmon! Ok so it was a rough day but did the doctor really need to call me today to tell me I owe them $1000.00 for something they couldn't even figure out how to do!!!!

All I can say is good burn. I feel better now.